| .: BIO :. | Written in 1999? |
Written by JAMIE, THE OTHER EVIL BIO WRITER!
Melissa is 17 and a damn good Dr. Scott. But she used to play Columbia because she just has this whole worship Jamie thing going and enjoys performing with me, being I'm lead Eddie. It's sad really having a seventeen-year-old plead just to be near you, but well the poor girl can't help it. You'd think she would worship someone more worthy or at the very least better looking, but no she just happens to love short pudgy guys who resemble rock icons. And she has this fetish for licking men men named Testiclese too, so she's just in heaven Saturday nights when me and the four dozen-or-so men named Testiclese show up, licking away like a psychadelic dog in an Australian frog farm. Hopefully she'll grow out of it someday. The Testiclese fetish not the Jamie is GOD craze; I like that part.
Addition by SAM, THE ORIGINAL EVIL BIO WRITER!
Melissa currently lives in a Meatloaf/Jamie Niles decorated cardboard box on the sidewalk in front of Jamie's New Port Richey home and is hoping to save up enough money for a pony and a 10 foot blinking neon sign saying "David Bowie lives here".
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